Before Matt and I had met, we were travelers. Since leaving school, the longest I'd lived in one place was a year. As many who have traveled would understand, it's addictive!

We met in sad circumstances and at the end of a travel era we had both experienced separately before meeting. We were then married and having our first baby within two years of meeting! The only adventures we experienced as a couple were some memorable camping trips. They were truly wonderful! I love camping. I love the way it makes us all get back to basics. I also find I go to sleep earlier and the toasty warmth of the camp fire and fresh air relax me.

We have both talked about traveling Australia with a caravan and our troopy for the past few years. It doesn't feel as easy to leave the comfort and security of  home as it once did in those freedom years! All of a sudden we need to be responsible for two little people and know that we can support them and ourselves whilst on the road. By that I don't just mean financially. Their needs for comfort and security are important to me and I hope we can meet them while traveling. Matt has no doubt about this one. He knows we will meet lots of traveling families on our adventure and I know this is true, but it's still scray stepping out of our comfort zone and leaving our beautiful friends here.

So what happens when two traveling hearts meet and become a family of four? The traveling hearts double ... hopefully?! Jedda is a natural traveler and adapts to new situations easily, but Tully likes his home comforts. Including the king size bed we share! He doesn't like being in the car which has made long trips a challenge, but we figure (read; hope) we can stop whenever we need to, as there will be no deadlines to arrive anywhere on time. So some days we might only conquer an hour or two and that is OK.

We have finally given ourselves a time to leave and at this stage are hoping to head south in October (we live in Port Macquarie). No date as yet, a month is big enough for us at the moment! There is so much to organise in the next few months but I like having a project to work on.

I'm excited!!!



 
Rhythm is something I've thought a lot about over the past few years. I long for a home filled with creativity, love and home made food. I have days with my little loves that seem to just flow. They are blissful days! I always try and remember what it was I did differently on those days. I'm definitely less distracted by my phone on the days that flow well which helps for me to remain present.

The days when I'm not feeling present, are when the wheels tend to fall off.

This week started strangely. I think it was a combination of things after being away for a week with Matt. Tullaroo seemed to react badly to a week away without him and became resentful towards me, lashing out with screaming and a temper I hadn't seen before! Meanwhile Jedi seemed to fade into the background while I tired to help him calm down several times while we were away, and then a few when we came home. I expected her to have a reaction after he settled back down and she did. So it was an interesting 10 days and gave me a chance to learn.

I posted an exasperated status update on facebook asking for gentle methods to cope with these sudden melt downs. I felt my babies had lost some trust in me temporaily which was quite heart breaking! When they are angry and upset, I feel it's almost always a direct response to my head space at that time. Or am I blaming myself unnecessarily?! Mothers are definitely prone to blaming ourselves when things go wrong but what I mean is, there is a level of disconnection between us at those times and I'm not really listening or observing their needs properly. Anyway, posting the question helped in itself, before the replies started flowing in.

As I clicked 'post' it occurred to me that when these melt downs are happening, they have a time frame. So instead of trying to stop it in its tracks, I would be better to allow Tully to really vent his anger and frustrations and to let him know I am there for him, calm and available for when he is ready for either a hug or chat. I was instead 'reacting' which never works.

They need to know we are able to cope with all of their moods, not just their happy ones. I believe in gentle parenting and thankfully there are lots of resources out there available to help inspire me to find alternative ways of parenting through the tougher days, when I start to doubt that my gentle approach can really work! I had heard about 'terrible twos' before (I don't like that term) and knew that what Tully was experiencing would fit that descripton, but he hadn't been so angry before and I felt there was an issue that needed resolving. So peace has been restored for now. I have asked them both not to scream at me when they are upset and get down on their level so I don't intimidate them by standing above them. It seems to be working for now.

Ali :-)



 
I have been on a different planet this week! Planet gastro. I hope we don't visit it again in the near future.

It started on Sunday night with Jedda and Matt coming down with it at the same time. Followed by Tully on Wednesday and me with the grand finale on Thursday. I am so much better at being the carer than the patient. Actually, I'd probably have better patient skills if I were able to BE the patient but what is a mummy to do I ask?! Especially a mother who is breastfeeding on demand. The demand doesn't just stop because I'm sick.

I must say, I had major breastfeeding aversion for the first time since Tully was born. This makes me sad to admit but at the same time, I feel most mothers probably would have felt the same way. Vomiting one minute, breastfeeding the next... you get the picture.

It's been a crazy full on week. 

I'm also driving to Brisbane tomorrow with the kids and my mum to see my beautiful sister and my lovely niece for the next week. Hopefully my migraine eases in time for the car trip which feels long at the best of times. We don't have a DVD player for the car yet. I keep pretending we are living in the 80's and that kids still want to play eye spy and 'count the coloured cars'. I clearly remember counting white cars on long trips. Jed is a happy traveller. We do hear 'are we there yet?' every half hour or so but aside from that, she is my low maintenance travel mate. Tully is another story! But he isn't really interested in TV shows or movies yet (except for the Edinburgh tattoo as he's obsessed with bagpipes) so I don't think a DVD player would work anyway. And I just don't know if I can listen to bagpipes for hours on end whilst driving. Plus there is something inside of me just wanting to keep car travel a bit old fashioned and boring. I know, mean mummy!! No, I'm not really. If we decide to get one to make our lives easier, so be it. Our family is spread so far and wide across this large country, that we will be travelling a lot. I figure as they get older, it will be easier to entertain without technology ... or do I need someone to burst my bubble?!

I hold no judgment against those with DVD players by the way!! I totally understand why they were invented.

We will be away until next weekend and I am going without my trusty lap top, so will write again when we get home. Hopefully I will have a tale to tell from our week away. I'm looking forward to switching off from the distractions of daily life at home, that is for sure.

Until then, I hope you all have a lovely and healthy week!

Ali xx

 
This is the question I wish people would ask, before jumping to conclusions based on what they see of my own passionate beliefs.

The answer was originally in a nutshell 'yes, until they can decide for themselves'. This theory worked well with our Jedda bean. She seemed to thrive on a vegetarian lifestyle. Legumes and other 'windy' veggies were never an issue with her. Her first favourite food was curry and we even ended up having an Indian themed 1st birthday party for her based on how much she loved vegetarian Indian food (she ended up sleeping through the whole thing however...) We decided that once she was more aware of what meat was, we would leave the choice to her. When Tully arrived I knew instinctively that it wouldn't be as easy. He didn't digest legumes as well and wasn't really interested in eating until we discovered he was tongue tied at 10 months. That's a whole other blog post...

So from around a year old we offered him some fish and at around 14 months, we offered him red meat as well. We decided if the concept of eating animals didn't sit well with him later on, that he could decide not to eat it. Very different children! He is quite small and it feels like he may need meat. He also has bigger teeth! I'd never felt this way with Jedda (unitil she recently became more fussy with dinner) This is what I mean when I say I learned to trust my instincts.

Jedda still won't eat red meat. She did try it and didn't like it. She does enjoy chicken sometimes though (which is the number one animal I can't stand to cook, particularly as we have chooks) and fish as well. Tully will eat most things these days although hasn't been keen on bolognese the last few attempts. To be honest we probably haven't offered meat often enough. Maybe once a week or fortnight. I keep meaning to incorporate it more, but I'm so used to cooking wholesome vegetarian food, that it doesn't even occur to me that his diet is 'missing something'.

My main concerns with rasising predominantly vegetarian children, are that they are getting enough iron and b12 in their diets. It's crucial for brain development, energy and healthy blood cells. I've had a few health checks over the years to make sure I had adequate iron and b12, as I've been breastfeeding for a long time and needed to know I could supply it through my milk. Thankful for eggs!

My own reasons for being vegetarian are based on not being able to bring myself to kill an animal. I feel if I can't kill it and face its death, then I don't feel I should eat it. I think nutritionally meat serves an important purpose for people and I would never deny that it's tasty, but I feel physical pain when I imagine the animal itself. It's no longer just a food product on a styrofoam tray. I felt this way during my teenage years. It just never felt 'right' but I didn't want to inconvenience our family and decided to wait until leaving home to make this choice.

The main argument I have heard over the years is that vegetarians are inflicting their choice on their children. It frustrates me as no matter our decision as parents, we are inflicting our choice on them. If our kids are healthy and happy, then why is there ever a need to criticise I wonder?

Ali xx 

 
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Nursing Tully to sleep and the the way he puts his little hand over his eyes to shield them from the light so he can fall asleep.
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A double rainbow on an afternoon walk

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Dressing up as a tiger

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My glorious niece, Finlay xx

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A family meeting at the back door

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Our love

 
I knew it would happen!

I wrote my first blog post earlier, read over it later and realised it gave no insight into who I am and what brings me to blog about my parenting journey. I accepted my first failed attempt and farwelled it into the blogosphere. From now on, I will stick to writing at night time after everyone has gone to bed. This is generally the time when I first switch off in my busy day. I remember when we were growing up with my mum who was on her own for my teenage years, saying to her at bed time 'are you sure you won't be lonely after we go to bed'? In hindsight I find it funny as I'm QUITE ready for alone time at the end of my day as a parent, but in another way, it was sad as I'm sure there were in fact many nights when she would have preferred company (but maybe not of the offspring kind?!).

I knew early on I wanted to be a mother one day and the experience has not been disappointing. Even after many years travelling the world and living overseas, experiencing the ultimate freedom, I felt like life would truly be complete with a family of my own 'one day'. Finding the right man to create this bliss proved tricky and I was convinced he was hiding in the highlands of Scotland. Little did I know he was to be found travelling up the coast in a white van to see Ben Harper play one chilly April. Thanks RSVP!!

I see unlimited potential in my kids and they inspire me daily. I'm not afraid to admit that they are my world at the moment. They are young for such a small amount of time. I don't want to miss a beat! I know happiness shouldn't depend on anyone else, but for me it does to a certain extent. When my husband and kids are happy and healthy, I feel pure joy! But my greatest source of happiness comes from appreciating the beautiful moments in each day, no matter how small. For example, poor Jed had a tummy bug last night, which she kindly shared with 'mate mate' (husbands nickname chosen by Tully). During the midst of vomiting and changing sheets for the third time at 2am, she stood by the side of her bed asking me if she could help me change the sheets. So although I was awake most of the night, I felt elated that she was so thoughtful while sick and exhausted.

I'm currently a stay at home mum. We have chosen to live within our means in order for me to do so. I like to describe the way we live as 'Islander style' (think... Fijian shack?!) in our tiny abode here in Port Macquarie. Matt is currently working 3 jobs and studying (disabilities) and I'm about to enroll in Nutritional Medicine and throw a distance ed degree into the mix. You can never be too busy...

Motherhood has been the biggest learning curve of my life to date. I let go of the books and have learnt to trust my instincts more. I feel as a society we are moving further away from what instinctively 'feels' right to reading up on how to make our children as independant as possible, from birth. Does anyone else feel this way? I'd rather just try and enjoy the ride as much as possible, hiccups and all.

Ali xx



 







 
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    My name is Ali. I'm a vegetarian mama to Jedda (4) and Tully (2) and wife to a bearded man. Thank~you for joining me on this part of my journey as a mother.

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