I have never been so tired in my entire life. I had been awake for well over 24 hours. We had spent much of the day with midwives coming into our room to milk me. Well, that’s how it felt. They did not hesitate to grab my boobs and squeeze away or shove my nipple in bubs mouth in an attempt to show him how to feed. There was a lot of squeezing, which was quite painful, and it produced very little return.
At some point on that first morning someone had told me I wasn’t able to get out of bed until the next day. “What?!” I had no idea this was the case. When the anesthetist told me I’d have feeling back by 10am, in my bleary state I had foolishly thought that meant I’d be up and about by 10am. “Oh no,” exclaimed the nurse, “you’re not going anywhere today.” A caesar was the only thing I had barely researched because it was my absolute last option. I was surprised and annoyed at first, but then I came to see being bed bound as a great thing. First of all, I was pretty comfortable and had a remote control to move my bed up and down. I’m pretty sure this was the same bed from the night before, only now it felt like a bed of clouds. It’s amazing what lack of sleep, dropping some kilos and lying on your back can do. I think I got the best sleep I’ve ever gotten. Secondly, I realised around mid afternoon that I had a catheter in. This was the best news ever! Having to go to the loo is one of life’s annoyances if you ask me. And it’s way worse during pregnancy so I thought this was great! With this new bit of information, I started to drink like there was no tomorrow. I went through so much water. The poor nurse was surprised that all of a sudden my pee bucket was filling up so quickly. But honestly, when would I get this chance again? And lastly, the good thing about being stuck in bed was that anytime bub was upset or needed feeding, hubby had to get up and bring him to me. Or if he needed a nappy change, hubby had to do it. Or if I needed my food brought to me, hubby had to do it. Hey, I carried his child for over nine months, he can bring me stuff for 24 hours. I was also yet to change my first nappy. I mean my first nappy ever. So delaying this was not bad either.
Poor bub was so keen to feed but was struggling to get it right. The midwives were great at teaching him though. It was quite frustrating, but by the end of the first day he pretty well had it. I still had to help him each time, but together we would get it right and he would just suck away for hours and then fall asleep. While he slept I loved watching his facial expressions. He’d smile, then raise his eyebrows, then frown and so on. I found it very amusing. I was surprised to learn that he was a noisy sleeper though. Apparently all babies make noises while they sleep. This made it hard during the night to know if he was awake or not as I couldn’t get up to check.
Day two arrived, the day I was allowed to get up. It was midday before the nurse had a chance to help me. I had been bed ridden for over 32 hours. When I got up, I noticed the weight of my belly was still quite heavy and I certainly was not able to stand up straight. I was on a lot of pain killers so I didn’t feel pain, I just had no strength. I was keen to see my scar, but my belly was blocking my view from all angles. I so enjoyed my shower though and also inspected my body post birth. Belly was still huge. Although I had been particularly big in my pregnancy so it shouldn’t have surprised me that I was still quite big. My ankles were a lot smaller, but otherwise not much had changed. How disappointing.
I was pretty slow to do anything at first but as the days went on I got a little quicker. It was such a treat when hubby suggested we go for a walk outside of our room. I hadn’t been out of our room since we arrived and it was day three. We just did a loop on our floor but it was good to get out and walk, even though I looked like an old lady hobbled over.
Right off the bat, we learned we had a windy baby. We spent the wee hours of the morning trying to soothe him. Nothing was working. Of course we didn’t know wind was the problem at the time. We had a fantastic midwife come into our room and show us all the different burping techniques, which seemed to really settle bub. Hubby learned quickly how to do this, which helped bub a lot. But one night, perhaps I should say one morning as it was about 2am, bub’s gas was so bad and nothing we did was working. We pressed that magic yellow button that makes a midwife appear. She offered to take our baby away. What? Do they really do this? Am I a bad mother if I let them take him because I can’t keep my eyes open? Hubby was super keen to take this offer up. “Yes, thank you, please take him.” Oh, I wasn’t sure how I felt about this but bub was being wheeled out of the room before I had time to process. They brought him back a few hours later when he needed a feed and I realised that the world hadn’t caved in. I still wasn’t sure if I felt ok about palming him off though.
The next night they came in around midnight and took him again. I decided I needed to make the most of it and get some sleep. I think this is what people mean when they tell you to make the most of being in hospital. I woke up at 6am and bub wasn’t back. I thought that was weird as he was such a hungry baby. I felt quite anxious so I got up and went to the reception desk. I tried to act casual as I asked where my baby was. “He’s still sleeping in the nursery. Would you like us to get him?” I couldn’t believe he was still sleeping. Who was I to disturb him just to ease my anxiety? “No, that’s ok, let him sleep.” I said. But I hung around the area thinking he’d wake up at any moment. Then I went back to our room, then reception, then our room and reception again. I kept doing this until hubby woke up. Clearly he wasn’t worried. By now it was about 7am so we went together to get bub, who was still sleeping. By the time we had wheeled him back to our room, he was stirring and just about ready for a feed.
We had decided we weren’t going to have visitors in hospital. It was a decision we wrestled with for quite some time in the lead up to the birth. Once we were at the hospital though, we felt confident that this was the right decision. For us, having visitors would have added way too much pressure and stress to a situation that was already super overwhelming. The funny thing was that the midwives almost cheered us when we told them this. They were very quick to say that this is not the time for visitors and that visitors would be better taken at home. Clearly visitors got in their way, which hadn’t crossed my mind when making this decision. We may have offended some people in doing this (I hope not) but it turned out to be the best decision for us. If there is a time in your life not to oblige others, this is it. Plus, if there is a time in your life that others will understand, this is it. I have no idea how we filled our days but every day was busy and any spare moments or down time we had were used to rest, sleep and catch our breath.
Because I had a caesar the expected stay in hospital was five nights. Including the night I was induced, that makes six. So when it came time to go home, I had become so reliant on the midwives, not to mention the food service, that I felt quite uneasy about leaving. It was like taking away my training wheels before I was ready (which my dad actually did to me when I was four by the way). We had only known our baby in this environment, which happened to have medical staff on hand 24 hours a day. Hubby was totally fine though and keen to get out of there. I don’t know anyone who knows less about babies than me, but here I was walking out of the hospital with a newborn. All I could do now was hold on for the ride.
At some point on that first morning someone had told me I wasn’t able to get out of bed until the next day. “What?!” I had no idea this was the case. When the anesthetist told me I’d have feeling back by 10am, in my bleary state I had foolishly thought that meant I’d be up and about by 10am. “Oh no,” exclaimed the nurse, “you’re not going anywhere today.” A caesar was the only thing I had barely researched because it was my absolute last option. I was surprised and annoyed at first, but then I came to see being bed bound as a great thing. First of all, I was pretty comfortable and had a remote control to move my bed up and down. I’m pretty sure this was the same bed from the night before, only now it felt like a bed of clouds. It’s amazing what lack of sleep, dropping some kilos and lying on your back can do. I think I got the best sleep I’ve ever gotten. Secondly, I realised around mid afternoon that I had a catheter in. This was the best news ever! Having to go to the loo is one of life’s annoyances if you ask me. And it’s way worse during pregnancy so I thought this was great! With this new bit of information, I started to drink like there was no tomorrow. I went through so much water. The poor nurse was surprised that all of a sudden my pee bucket was filling up so quickly. But honestly, when would I get this chance again? And lastly, the good thing about being stuck in bed was that anytime bub was upset or needed feeding, hubby had to get up and bring him to me. Or if he needed a nappy change, hubby had to do it. Or if I needed my food brought to me, hubby had to do it. Hey, I carried his child for over nine months, he can bring me stuff for 24 hours. I was also yet to change my first nappy. I mean my first nappy ever. So delaying this was not bad either.
Poor bub was so keen to feed but was struggling to get it right. The midwives were great at teaching him though. It was quite frustrating, but by the end of the first day he pretty well had it. I still had to help him each time, but together we would get it right and he would just suck away for hours and then fall asleep. While he slept I loved watching his facial expressions. He’d smile, then raise his eyebrows, then frown and so on. I found it very amusing. I was surprised to learn that he was a noisy sleeper though. Apparently all babies make noises while they sleep. This made it hard during the night to know if he was awake or not as I couldn’t get up to check.
Day two arrived, the day I was allowed to get up. It was midday before the nurse had a chance to help me. I had been bed ridden for over 32 hours. When I got up, I noticed the weight of my belly was still quite heavy and I certainly was not able to stand up straight. I was on a lot of pain killers so I didn’t feel pain, I just had no strength. I was keen to see my scar, but my belly was blocking my view from all angles. I so enjoyed my shower though and also inspected my body post birth. Belly was still huge. Although I had been particularly big in my pregnancy so it shouldn’t have surprised me that I was still quite big. My ankles were a lot smaller, but otherwise not much had changed. How disappointing.
I was pretty slow to do anything at first but as the days went on I got a little quicker. It was such a treat when hubby suggested we go for a walk outside of our room. I hadn’t been out of our room since we arrived and it was day three. We just did a loop on our floor but it was good to get out and walk, even though I looked like an old lady hobbled over.
Right off the bat, we learned we had a windy baby. We spent the wee hours of the morning trying to soothe him. Nothing was working. Of course we didn’t know wind was the problem at the time. We had a fantastic midwife come into our room and show us all the different burping techniques, which seemed to really settle bub. Hubby learned quickly how to do this, which helped bub a lot. But one night, perhaps I should say one morning as it was about 2am, bub’s gas was so bad and nothing we did was working. We pressed that magic yellow button that makes a midwife appear. She offered to take our baby away. What? Do they really do this? Am I a bad mother if I let them take him because I can’t keep my eyes open? Hubby was super keen to take this offer up. “Yes, thank you, please take him.” Oh, I wasn’t sure how I felt about this but bub was being wheeled out of the room before I had time to process. They brought him back a few hours later when he needed a feed and I realised that the world hadn’t caved in. I still wasn’t sure if I felt ok about palming him off though.
The next night they came in around midnight and took him again. I decided I needed to make the most of it and get some sleep. I think this is what people mean when they tell you to make the most of being in hospital. I woke up at 6am and bub wasn’t back. I thought that was weird as he was such a hungry baby. I felt quite anxious so I got up and went to the reception desk. I tried to act casual as I asked where my baby was. “He’s still sleeping in the nursery. Would you like us to get him?” I couldn’t believe he was still sleeping. Who was I to disturb him just to ease my anxiety? “No, that’s ok, let him sleep.” I said. But I hung around the area thinking he’d wake up at any moment. Then I went back to our room, then reception, then our room and reception again. I kept doing this until hubby woke up. Clearly he wasn’t worried. By now it was about 7am so we went together to get bub, who was still sleeping. By the time we had wheeled him back to our room, he was stirring and just about ready for a feed.
We had decided we weren’t going to have visitors in hospital. It was a decision we wrestled with for quite some time in the lead up to the birth. Once we were at the hospital though, we felt confident that this was the right decision. For us, having visitors would have added way too much pressure and stress to a situation that was already super overwhelming. The funny thing was that the midwives almost cheered us when we told them this. They were very quick to say that this is not the time for visitors and that visitors would be better taken at home. Clearly visitors got in their way, which hadn’t crossed my mind when making this decision. We may have offended some people in doing this (I hope not) but it turned out to be the best decision for us. If there is a time in your life not to oblige others, this is it. Plus, if there is a time in your life that others will understand, this is it. I have no idea how we filled our days but every day was busy and any spare moments or down time we had were used to rest, sleep and catch our breath.
Because I had a caesar the expected stay in hospital was five nights. Including the night I was induced, that makes six. So when it came time to go home, I had become so reliant on the midwives, not to mention the food service, that I felt quite uneasy about leaving. It was like taking away my training wheels before I was ready (which my dad actually did to me when I was four by the way). We had only known our baby in this environment, which happened to have medical staff on hand 24 hours a day. Hubby was totally fine though and keen to get out of there. I don’t know anyone who knows less about babies than me, but here I was walking out of the hospital with a newborn. All I could do now was hold on for the ride.
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